Hope. Strength. Joy

The goal of Make-A-Wish is to promote these things…hope, strength, and joy. In fact, the mission statement for Make-A-Wish is to “grant the wishes of children with life-threatening medical conditions to enrich the human experience with hope, strength, and joy.” Two days from now, we get the opportunity to meet together with other Make-A-Wish families and supporters for the Walks for Wishes event at John Ball Zoo. Walks for Wishes is a fundraising event that celebrates wishes that have already been granted and raising funds for future wishes. We are looking for YOU to come alongside of us for this event. I’ll tell you how in a minute!

For those of you who do not know, Kai is a “wish kid”. Before becoming one, Chris and I could not have imagined the positive impact this organization would have on our family. Sure, part of the impact is pure fun. Kai has wished for a farm playhouse with a blue slide. Trust me; the blue slide is a critical component to this whole structure!! We have final design plans for the playhouse and have met with Mike, the builder from Out on A Limb Playhouses. While Kai’s will be slightly different, here is the basic idea of what his playhouse will look like:

We know that, with all he has been through, Kai is just ready to get out and play! Of course, he is getting a material possession from his wish. But it is so much more than just getting something. When he gets to work on the design or help the builder put flags up in the yard to mark where it will go, he gets to forget about all things medical for a short while. He gets to think about just being a “normal” 3 year old. The rest of us get to forget about the stresses of his illness for a short while. It’s good for our souls to have this shared positive experience. Through Kai’s wish, we have also had the opportunity to gather and talk with other Wish families and share the similar struggles and triumphs. Each child’s journey is different, but there is comradery in speaking to other families who understand our highs and lows. We’ve also built relationships with the Make-A-Wish staff and volunteers who are so passionately dedicated to making life more enjoyable for kiddos. All of this is very empowering.

While I write this, I have to admit that before we became a Wish family I had heard of Make-A-Wish, but I didn’t really know anything other than the name. Like I said above, the organization grants wishes for kiddos at least 2.5 years old who have life-threatening illnesses. Receiving a wish involves 4 steps: “each step builds on the next to create amazing experiences that delight wish kids and their families. A wish experience is frequently a source of inspiration for children undergoing difficult medical treatments.” The first step is the referral. Children can be referred by medical staff, parents, or themselves (if they are old enough). Secondly, Make-A-Wish determines medical eligibility by contacting the treating physician. After that, kiddos get to express their wish and the team gets to work. Most children make a wish that falls into 1 of 4 categories: I wish to go…, I wish to meet…, I wish to have…, I wish to be. The last step is creating joy! The Make-A-Wish team works out all of the details and creates an unforgettable experience and works toward making each wish perfect! I can tell you from personal experience that this organization and its staff and volunteers are amazing. I know that they deeply care for Kai and our family!

Now, about the Walk for Wishes event…

We are looking for friends and family to participate in this event with us –to show support for Kai, all of the other kiddos suffering from life-threatening illness, and the organization that works to help! Although the walk is only a couple of days away, we’d love for you to sponsor Team Kai. Please know that the funds raised do not go directly toward Kai’s wish, per se, but toward meeting the financial needs of all wishes. To do so, head to the Make-A-Wish website (michigan.wish.org) and click on the Walk for Wishes icon. Once you are there, scroll down to the “Ways to Help” heading located on the left side of the screen.  There you can make a donation.  Click on “donate to a walk participant”. Once you do that, you will be prompted to do a name search –just search for my name. Once you click on my name, it will direct you to my personal donation page. To donate, just click the blue “give now” button.  For those of you wondering, MAW strives to use the majority of funds raised to do what their name says –make wishes come true. More than 80 cents of each dollar goes directly toward granting wishes!

Thanks for considering and helping to change lives! 

A Thousand Reasons

When life gives you 100 reasons to cry, show life that you have 1,000 reasons to smile.

Recently I had someone ask me why Chris and I chose to adopt a child like…that.  

As you can imagine, at that moment a million thoughts and responses swirled through my head. My child is not like that. Sure, he has a heart defect. Ok, several heart defects. Sure, he has a pretty significant scar on his chest. But, he’s not “bad” or “wrong”, which is what that implies. No kiddo with heart problems ---or any other health issue—is.

The same day I had this conversation I saw this quote posted by the mama of another heart kiddo. It is so true. When having a child with multiple, life-threatening heart defects, there are 100 reasons to cry.

There are doctor appointments— so many doctor appointments.

There are surgeries and complications.

There is watching numbers and levels.

 There is rushing to the emergency room.

There are the doctor bills.

There is trying to find the balance of taking care of the “sick” child and still being there for the “other” kid.

There are sleepless nights filled with worry.

There is waiting and unknowns.

There’s no doubt about it; it’s hard. It can easily get tiring and overwhelming. I think the “that” opinion and attitude happens when people can’t see past the reasons to cry. I know I’ve said this before, but this journey of adopting and our crash course in cardiology is one of the toughest things I’ve ever done. But, it’s one of the best. While, for his sake, we wish that Kai did not have to experience all of the meds, and pokes, and appointments, it has changed who we are in ways that I would never want to take back. I think life-threatening illnesses tend to do that to families. It’s probably cliché to say, but children who are faced with death have a lot of teach us about what it means to live.

That has given us 1,000 reasons to smile.  As strange as it may seem, we smile more now that we ever have. I think we have more to smile about. Or, we’re just much more aware about what we should be smiling about.  Of course, we smile about pink fingers and good INR checks. We smile about how Kai calls the Ronald McDonald House the Old MacDonald House. We smile at Kai each morning when he checks on his “playhouse”, which is really just a set of flags in the yard right now. We smile how each night at bedtime Kai asks if he can have cottage cheese for breakfast. Focusing on the smiling instead of crying is intentional. I think it’s the difference between having joy, rather than just happiness.

While life is incredibly hard with Kai’s health problems, he has brought more joy into our lives than is possible to articulate in words. But, one thing we've learned is kiddos with health problems - -kiddos like that are full of love and spunk and hope. And smiles!

Some of our reasons to smile